|
|
|
My love,
It is only a few days since you left but already it feels as though long empty months have gone by. I found myself today as yesterday listening out for the sound of your feet in the hall, the dull rustle of you removing your jacket and hanging it by the door. And yet again I set us two places here at the table tonight; dinner was so quiet facing a space exactly your shape and size. I paused at the shower door to hear your tuneless singing vying with the roar of the water, but only a tap dripped. I miss the soft scent of your skin next to me on the couch, and the dampness of your hair nestled beside me in bed. The sheets still smell of your warm limbs, lover, and if I close my eyes its as though I could reach out and stroke my hand down the curve of your jaw, feel the pulse in your neck as strong as my own heart beating. I long to hold you close against me again, feel the heat of your body entwined with mine and the sharpness of your teeth on my shoulder.
I remember our last night so well, you were almost asleep lying there on the sheet, and barely stirred as I came and sat by you. The massage oil was slick in my hands and the scent of roses was strong as I reached out to smooth along the length of your slender brown arms, following the path of your muscles down to your perfect hands, my breasts brushing your back as I leaned forward to caress all the way to your fingertips. I felt you relax beneath me as I pulled my hands so slowly back up towards your shoulders, across and round, kneading the nape of your neck with my thumbs, my fingers soothing and stroking the hollow of your neck, passing over the tiny scar from where you told me you broke your collar bone as a child, do you remember? I laughed at the thought of you leaping over flowers, then kissed away the hurt till you smiled too. Now I dragged my hands gently down your shoulder blades, to the sides and back again, circling, circling, the heat of my hands and the moisture in the oil giving you the look of burnished gold brought out of some hidden treasure ship to be held brightly dripping in the sunshine. I massaged down along your spine, feeling tense muscles and easing them away with a touch. You were a fine dessert melting at my attentions, and I leaned down to gently kiss your neck. My hands had reached the twin mounds of your behind, and I smoothed around the tempting flesh with tenderness, passing on to knead away the tautened muscles of your thighs, sliding palms down the curve of first one calf, then the other, to hold at last your shapely foot between my hands. I rubbed away at the sole and felt the tensions of your body slipping away. I bent my head and sucked your toe as softly as a whisper, then slid my hands more firmly back along your calves, your thighs, and reaching now the darkness at their ends, moved one hand along to massage you deep inside. I felt you relax into my skilful hand, my darling, and grow moister there with liquid sweeter than all the roses on this earth. I leant to taste you then and turned your lax body, the better to massage your high tight breasts as I suckled at your hole, and probed deep within your familiar folds, and licked across your hardened clit and drank deep of your sex. You shook and cried and I cried too, for this was to be our parting....
My love, the nights seem endless now without your murmured moans and the loving whispers in my ear as you tease my skin and play with my breasts, and kiss along the length of me. Sometimes I wake and think I feel a wisp of dark hair, yours, my sweet one, drift along my sleepy belly, but its always a breeze come, a thief in the night, to tantalise my dreams and make me hope. I imagine you there, in the world's ancient cities, lazed in a gondola, your hand lapped by wavelets instead of my tongue, or high up on the Tower, gazing at Paris with no-one to hold you, so you never will fall. Or perhaps at a party, honoured by princes, where your mind might wander away and come dance with me in my lonely dreams as if we had never been parted, a slow soft dance to eastern music, our bodies pressed close in the darkness. And at night, while you're sleeping, the same stars look down - will they see your sad hand stray too, to the place of your heart? Or the warm place of darkness, that sweet tasting hollow, the place where my mouth and my hands long to be. I miss you, I miss you, my love.
